I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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