She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
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