i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize