she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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