Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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