We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
