Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Randomize
