i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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