The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage