She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool