I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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