You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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