so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
