is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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