first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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