Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
