he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The police scanner is talking about you again....
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
So. Much. Porn.
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