i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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