yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
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Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize