You did not just play the dead husband card again.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
