You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize