He told me they were just razor bumps!
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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