You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
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