My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
