We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
