My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
