she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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