If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
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