I wanna bring you to show and tell
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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