Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
