she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
