just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
The Olympian is in my bed
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
