Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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