I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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