I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
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