my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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