I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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