That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
