I'm going to jail i love you
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
