hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize
