I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
be right there i have to get my cape
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
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