She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
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