what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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