his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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