I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Randomize
