WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
