My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
