To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
