No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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