got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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