You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I will pee on everything he values.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
