Dual....:-)
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
